There Are Too Many Jennys Up In Here

To add to my ever-increasing list of ailments (other than feeling generally crappy this week), I think I have a urinary tract infection. Ugh. I was in tears this morning, simply because I'm sick of having something wrong with me all. the. time. I decided I needed immediate attention and called my poor doctor this morning because I was terrified this meant I would have to cancel my follie scan this afternoon. Also, I read online that a urinary tract infection could be a side effect of Femara. The doctor reasured me that we can still do the scan this afternoon and if it turns out to be a problem, they will write me a perscription while I am there. I think she thinks I'm crazy. And, as it turns out, I am. I'm suffering from multiple personality disorder at the moment regarding my upcoming follie scan. Here's what's going on inside my head:
Living-in-the-moment Jenny: I am going to get over this bladder infection idea and do my work just like any other day, and not think about my appointment this afternoon. Because what if it goes badly? I can't hinge my entire day on a doctor's appointment!
Hopeful Jenny: Oh, but won't I feel just fantastic when/if they find out I have one or two siezable follies! And why shouldn't I? I mean, it's not as if Clomid was a complete bust-it just didn't work quite as it should. Femara hasn't made me crazy like the Clomid did; that's got to be a sign, right? And I've heard plenty of stories of PCOS women who tried Clomid and it didn't work, and they tried Femara and got pregnant on their first try! It could happen. It could, it could, it could!
Pessimistic Jenny: Yes, well, I know plenty of other stories of women who didn't get jack-squat from Femara. What makes you think you are going to be one of the lucky ones? You certainly haven't been lucky so far.
Hungry Jenny: I'm hungry.
Scientific Jenny: Well, you know Femara works in a completely different way to increase estrogen than Clomid does, blah, blah, blah. So your reaction to Clomid is completely unrelated to what your reaction will be to Femara. And, you have ovulated before, so you have the capability.
British Jenny: So chin up, old sport! You could be in for a jolly good scan this afternoon!
Pessimistic Jenny: I'm not holding my breath. I've had so many disappointments so far, it's hard to imagine things actually working the way they should. I haven't even "put in my time" yet. We've only been trying for 14 months and most women with PCOS take longer than that.
Hungry Jenny: Is it time for a snack yet?