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Yesterday Evening 6:30 PM- Dick Smith knocked on our front door to inquire if we had heard the commotion and then pointed to the carnage across the street. "Crazy woman done struck again." he informed us. Apparently, their stalker didn't take being served with a restraining order that afternoon very well. Dick and Jane told us that she came barreling down the street, took out the mailbox, and then just cruised off into the sunset. She even left an imprint of her bumper on the post. Poor bastard of a box was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Dick also said that last week she (she being the deranged loon) sent them a certified letter asking them to pay for the cost of her late husbands funeral. We were told the circumstances surrounding his departure were totally shady, allegedly having something to do with drugs and police brutality. I am certain that we aren't being told the full story, but Dick wouldn't elaborate, no matter how many leading and probing questions I asked. He mouth was closed as tightly as Paris Hilton's house arrest ankle bracelet (which hindsight tells me wasn't quite the metaphor I had hoped for). I am now forced to draw my own conclusions. I have never know Sharon Stone to be described as a large woman with wild dark hair, but maybe she bulked up for the part. However, I am having a tough time imagining her driving an American car....
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